Monday, December 05, 2005

I am VERY happy to be playing the yuckeyes

They are the weakest team amongst the BCS teams, and, quite frankly, are the one of the weakest in Division I-A. If I were looking for a competitive game, I would be disappointed. However, I'm looking for a good, old Fashioned ROBOT STOMP, and that's exactly what were going to get. Frankly, with the possible exception of the Indianapolis Colts, I don't think there is a team that can hang with the Irish the way we're playing, with the Robot Genius at the helm. And the Colts would probably only hang around for a quarter or so until the Robot STEPPED ON THE GAS and left those horsies in his MACHINE DUST!!

The biggest problem muckpies have is they are dumb. Players...Dumb. Coaches....Dumb. Fans.....Dumb. The genius robot will run circles around them, and their miniature brains will be firing at maximum three synapses per minute, with nothing but a "ehhhhhhhhhhh" eminating from their noggins, as Irish Lads FLY past them running all kinds of CRAZY plays.

The other problem Ohio Late has is that the color red DRIVES THE ROBOT ABSOLUTELY CRAZY!! It makes him DOMINATE ALL OPPONENTS IN HIS FIELD OF VISION. He might even break out the LASER DEATH RAY against the Ohio State band, and leave the dotted "i" a STAIN OF RED BLOOD AND CHARRED FLESH ON THE FIELD DURING THE HALFTIME SHOW OUT OF SHEER ROBOT MEANNESS!! Not that the Robot doesn't have a heart of gold, which he does, but these PuckPies just bring out the NASTY CODE in his algorithms.

The other problem, of course, is Ohio Late's head coach, Jim Tressel. You all know what a tressel is, don't you?? A tressel is something that is build under a dip in the earth to provide support for tracks for ...... A CRAZY WILD ND CHOO CHOO, with CHOO CHOO GENIUS ROBOT CHARLIE WEIS AT THE HELM..... TO BUST OVER AT BREAKNECK SPEED, whilst DESTROYING ALL IN ITS PATH!!

CHOOOOOOOO CHOOOOOOOOOOO ........... Destination Desert and .... GLORY.

ND in a ROMP. I guarantee it and stake my entire reputation on it, and will gladly fight anyone who has a different take at the ASU weightroom in the basement of the FIESTA BOWL STADIUM!!

16 Comments:

At 6:29 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2004/12/8parang.html

 
At 7:20 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

awesome post - you've outdone yourself, something I didn't think possible.

 
At 7:49 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

you are my hero

 
At 10:21 AM , Blogger rds said...

Outsmart tOSU??? Like you did MSU? You sound like someone trying to hide their insecurity with bravado.

 
At 10:45 AM , Blogger Marco said...

rds (reads suspiciously like "reds"), consider your commie butt kicked. We shall fight in by the ASU weight room. I shall fight for the Glory of the Robot and you, ... you can fight for, well,.... whomever.

Let's go shoot some pheasants!!

 
At 11:23 AM , Anonymous justin said...

can you please write a book? this stuff is great.

maybe a children's book about the genius robot?

 
At 12:27 PM , Anonymous domer95 said...

Great off the wall, wacky stuff. Keep up the great work!

rds, nice blog! Did you learn your writing skills in a 'classroom' at tO$U?

 
At 2:33 PM , Anonymous scott said...

Perhaps RDS honed his writing chops in the O$U Sports Management program that Yuckeye players are so fond of. Or, perhaps RDS was simply distracted trying to help AJ and Nick recover
the 3 Grand in cash and $500 Gucci watches that were stolen from their apartment. I hate it when I leave 3 grand lying around the house and it's subsequently stolen!

 
At 3:28 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ohio State will lose this game by at least 129 touchdowns. Jim Tressel is a damm varmint and were gonna get'em good.

 
At 4:09 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Marco,

Others are starting to realize Charlie is a genius robot, too! ESPN radio said that the Irish are so good, that they would play like robots by the time they played the Buckeyes. I'm serious! Check it out below!

http://abcrad.vo.llnwd.net/o1/espnradio/insider/herd/herd_12052005_1.mp3

 
At 2:48 PM , Anonymous COB said...

i now have time to fight you as previously planned, before something suddently came up. i will once again plan on meeting you at the parking lot of the hermosa beach chevron. except now its a texaco.

 
At 9:34 PM , Anonymous acs7@neo.rr.com said...

Great stuff !!! Keep it up..

 
At 3:25 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

This stuff is hilarious...if you are in third grade. Seriously, get a life. You are a LOSER.

 
At 4:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Wacko - The Iwish haven't had a team since the old Ara when the Iwish played on Sunday. Bet all your crack money on the Iwish and destitute will be your namo.

 
At 8:45 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why do these stupid shmuckeye fans reply to this stuff? There's nothing they can say that is remotely smart enough or funny enough to one up Marco! Long Live Choo Choo Charlie!!

 
At 5:58 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Everyone will jump on the Irish Choo Choo after a victory on the 2nd!

 

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